Nevermore
by Heart of the Lullaby
Summary: How Ron's temporary departure in Deathly Hollows should have happened. A oneshot. WARNING: R/Hr


**A/N: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, this was definately the way the temporary departure of Ron would have been like. **

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Even though Ron was my best friend along with Harry, most of the time I couldn't stand him.

He always ruined things for me. Like when we both arrived at Hogwarts, I so badly wanted to have a friend. I found that in Harry, and he shoved me away, telling everyone what a know-it-all I was.

Or the Yule Ball in Year 4. I was having the best time with Victor Krum, and he had to spoil everything by getting in this huge fight with me.

Despite all that, he had always been there for me; a shoulder for me to cry on, a hand to hold when I was scared.

We were usually always on opposite sides, but not recently. We've been disappointed in Harry's poor leadership, not getting any closer to finding anymore of the horcruxes. We couldn't help but gossip every time he wasn't around about how he might be hiding something from us, fantasizing about what it was.

Then, came that one night. We had just been overhearing a conversation between a few goblins and Dean, a fellow Gryffendor.

After they left, me and Harry got to discussing all that we heard, and we finally noticed Ron. Sitting in the corner, a scowl on his face, "Oh, remembered me, have you?" the start of a horrible argument between Harry and Ron.

He faced me,"What are you doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you staying, or what?"

"I…Yes – yes, I'm staying. Ron, we said we'd go with Harry, we said we'd help -"

"I get it. You choose him."

"Ron no – please – come back!" I ran after him, Harry was staying in place, frozen.

"I should have never agreed to this," Ron said, when I finally caught up with him.

"Ron, please, please! Don't do this" I screamed, running in front of him. He shoved past me.

"I'm leaving, okay? I can't stand this any longer." After a few moments of silence he added, "Why do you care so much anyways? Bloody hell, you're on his side!"

I ran in front of him again, and this time he didn't push past. He actually stopped and listed to what I had to say. We stood there for what felt like hours just staring in silence.

Then, I was caught up in the moment. I kissed him. The friend I never agreed with, the friend I was always fought with, the friend who ever since this journey, has been so cranky, I just want to kill him, I kissed him. Even though there were so things I hated it about him, I liked it. I liked it so much, it hurt.

"Why did you do that?" he whispered softly in my ear, sending a shivers up and down my spine.

What should I say? I hated him so badly, but it was his shoulder I cried on as opposed to Harry standing right next to me. It was his hand I held when Harry got on Buckbeak. Most importantly, he was the one who asked me to the Yule Ball, and I had turned him down. Then, I realized I had turned him down so many times. He had always been there for me, but when have I been there for him?

"I love you," I finally choked out, tears streaming down my face.

Then, he lifted up my chin slightly, and kissed me long and softly, "You don't have any idea…do you?" he whispered again.

"About what?" I asked, wondering what he meant.

He opened his mouth, about to say something, and then closed it. He opened his mouth again, "Never mind," he said bitterly, almost inaudible above the pounding of the rain, and squeezed past me.

"Don't leave!" I shrieked. He ignored me. I tried running after him, but he was too far ahead, "Ron! Ron! Ron!" I screamed like a maniac, "Please, please, please!!"

Then, he was so far ahead, he disappeared into the forest.

I came back to Harry, "He's g-g-gone! Disappeared!" and it was the truth.

I ran off before he could get a word in, and sat down on a flat little rock, and cried my heart out. Underneath it all, I really did love Ron. I looked up at the sky, and wondered what he was going to say. I was never going to know, and it ached.

After awhile, I cam back to the tent. Harry said nothing, but handed me a couple of blankets. I wrapped one of them around my shoulders, and we sat down together, staring ahead in stony silence.

I wanted Ron so badly. Soon, I couldn't help it, but I broke down and cried into my hands. Harry patted me reassuringly. It just didn't feel the same.

**--**

**R&R? **


End file.
